Silly Roxanna

He's dating the new girl... Which is why he didn't have time for me, and I am the idiot. The thing is, I know what love is, and whatever this is, isn't love. If a man really loves a woman, it doesn't matter if she's 10 miles away or 5000 miles away, if he thinks she's worth it, and he thinks that she is the woman he could spend the rest of his life with he will wait for her. Especially in the distance is temporary. When a boy tells a woman that he loves her and that he could see them having an amazing life together, and he runs around with other women, he doesn't mean it. So, after sending what was maybe the ugliest email I have ever sent anyone full of typos because of how mad I was (I edit myself like crazy, typos indicate how pissed I was) I decided that I was done and that I am going to learn to not care. He's a boy. He's a hurt and lost boy, but a boy none the less and I have niether the time nor the patience to deal with it. I was so hurt and mad last night that I couldn't sleep from anger. I gave my heart without even thinking, that's all he got, but that's just no good. If anything, this has taught me to be more gaurded. I was way too open. I was way too trusting. If anything, I should have been more careful. I'm sure if he were to read this, he would tell me that I am too gaurded, but clearly, based off of recent events this is not true. I am tired of feeling hurt. The best way to keep from getting hurt is to not let anyone in. That is the best solution. If someone wants to have my heart, from now on their pursuit is going to entail alot more than me giving freely.



So I told him everything about my life. I even let myself love him. I told him I did. Well, I take it all back. I don't care. I'm done. I'm taking back everything I said.

"I'm taking back when I said I would love you. I'm taking back every kiss that I gave you. I'm taking back every promise I made you. I'm taking back everything I said. When I said I would tell me what was I thinking?"