Music

It's amazing how you can fall in love with a song all over again years after you first heard it. This happened last night. I was listening to Stevie Nicks song Silver Springs on repeat for a good hour and it spoke to my heart. I'm not a good writer, I'm not very good at expressing myself, but when I listen to music, I hear my thoughts. Last night I found Silver Springs again. I had first heard this song when I was really small, maybe 4 or 5. My mom listened to nothing be classic rock when I was younger and so, I grew up with a love for Fleetwood Mac, Queen, Clapton, and the Eagles. When I hear songs from these artists, I am 6 again, singing in the car at the top of my lunges.

When I was 11, I sang in a wedding. I hated the song I had to sing, and I didn't want to sing the song I sang, but I loved singing. The teacher that asked me to sing in his wedding had taught me a Minnie Riperton song and I practiced singing it in his classroom. I sang "My Heart Will Go On" for his wedding... I still hate that song, but I still love "Memory Lane". Minnie had soul. I wanted to sing with that same kind of soul. Maybe when I was 14 I did... Maybe I still can. I've stopped singing. I sang for another wedding a couple of years ago. It was fun. I missed singing. Wait, scratch that, I miss singing. I sing all the time, but I miss choir, and weddings, and competition... I miss having music be the center of my life. When I get back to Vienna I'm going to join a choir. I need music to become the focus. I've been losing myself lately. I've been finding my worth and value in the men I date and in the people I make proud... I need to find value in myself and it needs to come from me.

I'm going to sing today at the top of my lunges and I don't really care who hears it. :)

Love yall!